I am sure you have encountered this situation before. You give your client or colleague the absolute right answer to an important issue. Instead of being grateful, they don’t appreciate, respect, nor recognize the value of your solution, work, or contribution to them.
We all want and enjoy a meaningful relationship where people appreciate and recognize the value of our solutions and contributions.
The critical factor in the success of any relationship is not your ability to listen communicate, or even to understand. While all of these are very useful tools, they are insufficient for optimizing or making the most out of key relationships.
The ultimate difference-maker for everyone in a relationship is how much value they perceive is present or possible in that relationship.
The more value someone perceives as being present and possible, the more that relationship is appreciated, enjoyed – and yes, valued. When there is little or no value perceived, there is little or no relationship. This is the most fundamental marker of relationship success there is – and it applies to every kind of personal and professional relationship.
Another clarification, along with understanding that value is the marker of success in a relationship, is that just being right is not often perceived as valuable.
As an expert in your field, you may often communicate exactly the right answer to an issue. You might be 100% right and absolutely giving everyone exactly what they need most to handle a tough situation. But you still don’t get the appreciation, respect, or recognition that what you offered is meaningful and valuable.
This perfectly illustrates our axiom #1 of high value relationships: “Being right is insufficient for being effective.” Anybody who is married knows what I am talking about…
This is a source of frustration for many experts of all kinds. Just because you are right does not mean you are going to be appreciated, respected, or even get a positive response.
The critical factor in a high value relationship is this: The other person must first understand the importance of their issue before they will have any appreciation for the value that you offer in solving it.
Only after they perceive the value of an issue you might be able to help them with does your answer produce a recognition of the value you are bringing. Until they recognize the importance of the issues you are handling on their behalf, they will not ascribe appropriate value to your solutions.
To maximize effectiveness, and be appreciated for your valuable contributions, the other person must have clarity about the importance of the issues being dealt with. Only then will clients and colleagues appreciate and recognize the value of your help. They must have this clarity before you start offering solutions.
It is only when they can see the importance of the issues you are taking care of with them that are they receptive and responsive to the value of your support. Once they really understand the value you can provide, your path to Becoming the Indispensable Partner in their success just got much shorter – and much faster.
For more valuable information, please go to: www.OptimizeIntl.com
BIO: Steve Lishansky, CEO of Optimize International, is a Hall-of-Fame executive coach, speaker, facilitator, and consultant known for elevating and accelerating the performance and results of CEO’s, C-Suite leaders, and their teams. He is the author of one Amazon #1 best-selling leadership and influence book. His new book –Leadership Starts Here – is due out in early 2021. Contact Steve at: www.OptimizeIntl.com, Steve@OptimizeIntl.com, or call 978-369-4525.